Project Dissertation

I moved to this fabulous city three years ago mainly to; be near an airport for travel, be able to not trade my stilletos for trainers, and to finish my doctoral studies in four years. Yes, that pretty much sums up my priorities at 30. So now I am ABD with nine months to go and San Francisco is no easy city to ignore. Although, I would argue that each experience that deters my academic writing is really just needed inspiration. Welcome and I hope you enjoy...

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Location: San Francisco, California, United States

Bilingual, Bicultural, and Dual Citizen. J School B.A., M.A. in High Incidence Disabilities, & ABD in Education.

Friday, July 06, 2007

Intuition Baby

I woke up and completed the thoughts from my dream, it was 5am.

It was clear, an unavoidable conversation no matter how uncomfortable: As he tried to say the events from weeks before didn't matter I pressed on that in a very small and basic way they did. His disregard for the well-being of others...affected my karma also. We had a history of half-truths.

It was just after 7am and the verbal sparing ensued, via text and long distance calls. Sometimes we grow and change and others don't acknowledge it, maybe that is what had happened to me here:Clearly he didn't see me. At the end of the hour long exchange I said I had no intention of relieving him of his karma or her of her presumable intuition.
*
What goes around comes around baby: My intuition is sharper than ever.
*
Nine-am my favorite student showed up to summer school, he has 15 days left to complete the 11 days he needs to complete his credits and receive his high school diploma. We did not push him out of school when the going got extremely difficult for him. Instead we chose to support and accommodate him through this final phase. His graduation will be the perfect note to end my 10 year career on.
*
Noon: Driving home from work through the hills between the Mission and the Upper Haight; the music was on, windows down, sun shining, I was just giving thanks for the day.

I approached the stop sign and as I thought about letting the officer go ahead- I didn't. The hills between the Mission and my neighborhood are dotted with four-way stop signs. As soon as I crossed the street I knew I had made an error.

Maybe I could redeem myself in a block and came to another four way stop with the police car behind me. Or maybe not?

Police lights on but no siren, I pull over on the tree and victorian lined street. For some whatever reason I turned the radio off and pulled my hair in a bun. Adjusted my dior sunglasses.

Officer approached, and I greeted him with a smile and a simple, "hi."
"Hello," he responds. I thought whatever it is I hope this officer Neitz is having a good day.

"Were you going to stop at either of the two stop sign?" he asked. "I did stop officer." He explained, "a complete stop, means you do not just role through."

"Oh but I did stop. I saw you you at the four way stop and since I had gotten their first realized it was my right of way. Then I saw you in the rear view mirror and stopped again. So I was really surprised when you pulled me over."

"You did not come to a complete stop at either stop sign," he took on a fatherly tone now. "I am not going to argue with you, but I know that I did, especially if you were watching!"

"You do not have to argue with me because I am right, you did not stop completely." I smiled, "I can't argue with you, but I stopped and that's all I know."

"You need to practice stopping," damn I thought, I have never gotten a moving violation. "Would you like me to practice here? There is a stop sign in front of us I can demonstrate here, or you could show me." I flustered him I think, "No, just practice your full stops."

Earnestly I said, "yes, I will, thank you, anything else?"

"Have a good day," he said and I said, "thank you, you too!"
*
Two-pm My friend came over and we talked about our day so far over tea. Her kids and my kids, her ex and my ex, then she said, "practice, you asked him if you should demonstrate how to come to a complete stop!" Yup, that's exactly what I did. "You must be cuter than me, because I got my ticket for the same thing." It has nothing to do with being cute, I assured her, I think I just made him laugh and fortunately today I was full of grace.

We made plans for the evening and I headed off to volunteer.

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

please don't publish the previous comment...thats just for you. please. thank you.

3:35 PM  

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